Wow it's been awhile since my last post, so much has happened since January. I can honestly say my life has turned 180 degree, some massive plot twist happened, both good and bad and I found my stability once again.

So, just to update you on the good, I finally moved to a new house, which I could not be more thankful for and God reached out for me again. I say "again" because you all wouldn't believe how many times I've stepped away from Him, still He calls me back, He accepts me back with joy in His loving arms, I'm so thankful that no matter who gives up on me, no matter what I say or do He still loves me.

I'd love to tell you all my testimony but I don't think it's still the right time, but trust me God has changed so many things in my life since the day I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. Mountains were moved, I saw miracles happen, I still see miracles happen in my life, doors that were closed are opened, my sin and shame are forever broken. Cos He gave me a new life and I live for Him cos He paid the price.

Quick reminder, I was away from church almost 1 year, and back in March there was still something stopping me from going to church, I was always saying "Next Sunday I'm going", but there was always something, either I was sick, or I had something to do, or a family reunion or simply the person who gave me a ride to church just couldn't pick me up. Pretty complicated.

So I started to fast, not fully, I stopped drinking things that weren't water and decided to be far from the social networks, internet in general, I just wouldn't turn the computer on at all.

First days it was kinda complicated but I kept praying, and every time I felt like I was being tempted into doing one of those things I'd simply pray. I felt sick for nearly 2-3months, I felt lonely, so many things were happening at the same time, I didn't know were to turn to. I asked the father to guide me, then one night I realized there was this one little thing missing.

I had accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior back in 2008, but I didn't do it because I wanted, I did it because I was pressured to do it, and I got really upset after I'd done it, (Now I'm thankful I was pressured to do it, but I believe y'all need to accept Jesus cause you feel like it, not just because someone's pressuring you) and this one night while I was still fasting I turned the radio on and this preacher was talking about people who stepped away from the father, and about the ones who were listening about him for the first time and he specifically said "Brothers and Sisters here in the church or even the ones who are listening to us through a radio station if you feel like you've been far from the father and you truly feel in your heart that you need Him and that You want Him to come into your life and your heart, it doesn't matter where you are, please repeat my words" And the preacher prayed and at that moment it got to me, I knelt and began to say those words, needlessness to say I shed a tear or two. You see, I had already been baptized, but I believe that it doesn't matter if you're baptized or not, if you feel like you're far from God you just need to pray and if you don't know how to that, don't go around trying to find the right words, just go ahead and say whatever you feel, give him your heart, say you accept Him in your life again, say that you're truly sorry... most of the time that's all that takes for God to be able to come into your life again. I mean, God is always by your side, but if we never turn to Him how can we expect Him to take over?

Don't be scared or ashamed to ask God for help, also saying "I don't know how to pray" it's a false statement! We all know how to pray, talking to the Father is the same as talking to your best friend, actually sometimes it's even easier cause God knows everything about you, and sometimes when you can't find the words even the tears will speak, cause God already knows what we need.

Be blessed

PS: if you need prayer just leave a comment below 

PS2: I might from now on leave a song in the end of every post, a song that either helped me in a certain situation or one that inspired me to write here. Here's one that helped me when I struggled with faith: